11.10.11

cross the bridge

Yesterday when I was checking my blog settings and clearing my dash and other internet spaces I was reminded of a blog I started a couple of years ago called 5ifty2. I didn't include a link but the premise of it was that there are 52 weeks in a year and 52 playing cards in a deck, coincidentally, and that I had at least 52 people in my life that I needed to communicate with so by writing their names on the face of each card and drawing a card a week, I could eventually reconnect and or finalize or provide closure to a number of loose end relationships that were weighing on my conscience. The plan failed after about 3 weeks. Some chapters are best left closed. This whole concept and memory flashed through my head quicker than it took you to read the word "Yesterday" in this blog post but it seems that it was not an accident that I was reminded of this concept of 52.

Each morning that I run I always break to do walking lunges across a bridge on our property. I have only just begun to be able to complete the entire length without stopping. I have never counted my steps before but for some reason today I did. As my steps grew harder my counting grew louder and more pronounced to help remind me that I could do it one step at a time, until I reached the end at 52. 52!  I smiled to myself. How coincidental! But my mind couldn't let it go. I went along running and thinking about this coincidence.

"52 lunges across the bridge, 52 weeks in the year, 52 playing cards, 4 suits in a deck, 4 seasons in a year, 4 symbols.  If I was to lay a card on each week I would give each suit a season, laying the aces on each equinox and solstice. What suit would I give each season? Well, obviously spring would be hearts, summer clubs, fall spades, and winter diamonds. Whoa. Why do I say obviously?"  . . .  and the conversation continued in my head as ran:

Well lets start with winter and diamonds. What does winter represent to me? A time of the mind, introversion, a drawing in, snow flakes, crystals, a mind like a diamond, the third eye, the star on my christmas tree, cold, purity, first day of the year, one, singularity, thinking. . .


Winter leads to spring and hearts. Hearts in spring= New buds on trees, rejoicing, new life, cell division at conception, love birds, joining, waking up, transition, change, preparation . . .

Clubs in the summer = clubs are like feet or paws, hiking, activity, physical activity and matters of the body, behaving like animals, being outside, swimming, camping, laughing, fruits and veggies, more raw foods, gardening, resting of the mind, a more physical existence . . .


And finally spades in the fall = leaves fall like spades, harvest, call a spade a spade, reaping what was sown, grieving the end of summer's bounty and the death and drawing in of nature, spades are upside down hearts, swords, the opposite of spring, a time to take inventory, move inward, digging in, collect your bounty. . .


This free association thinking lead me to myself. My body. . .  My body is like the earth. I have seas of water, soil growing new tissue, an atmosphere that renews and cleanses itself, my cells perform a form of photosynthesis, and I have seasons. Last spring, the time of the heart, I was sad. Lonely. I longed for more human connections. I felt the need and urges to ground myself after a long, intense winter of the mind. As I moved into summer I essentially shut my mind off and lived fully in my body. I ran and played and drank lots of beer and sang and laughed, behaved like an animal doing just whatever I felt like, grazing as I wished, storing up vitamin D in my skin, muscles on my bones, joy in my heart, and fat in my brain (as I didn't call on it to work much). As the fall approached I felt the shift. The dog days of summer were over. The time of the club and foot had ended. The leaves are now falling in spades and I am feeling a wealth of abundance from my harvest. I feel sharp. and ready to dig deeper.


I began replying to comments in the comment stream of my last post and will continue to communicate in the comments with you on an individual basis, though I have given myself very strict parameters related to my computer time in order to maintain a nice balance and to avoid burnout. Please know that I see you. Interaction and conversation are a huge part of what I am doing here so I absolutely welcome your insights.

All images can be traced back to their source through my tumbler.

12 comments:

Frannie Pantz said...

fifty two sounds like such a cool idea!

RETRO REVA said...

Just wanted to say Hi Christina!
My heart sings for you.
xXx
Reva

The Daily Fashionista said...

It's so interesting how numbers make up such significance in our lives. Makes me think of the movie Pi for some reason too. I'm happy you're back to blogging for yourself. Let me know how you're doing!! I hope all is well:)

Liv said...

So very happy to see you're back Christina! I'm also in dire need of finding my balance and regaining my sharpness. I think I misplaced it somewhere in the mid-80s.

Meg said...

I really like your summation of the seasons. My husband really hates the fall, but I love it, seeing it as a natural progression. Your post makes me feel better. I need to do some sharpening of my own after an "animal summer".

Open Door Studio said...

Yup, yup, yup and yup. Pretty much hit the nail on the head. Sometimes for me at least it takes me awhile until I see the flashing red light above my head indicating to me loud and clear whats going on, it just takes me awhile to look up and see it!

Anonymous said...

christina,
i am delighted that you are writing again! your words, style and philosophies always inspire me.
kelly

Terri said...

Christina--How wonderful to have you back! I've been feeling a bit of burn out myself--as much from my job as from blogging, but seeing your comment instantly refreshed me!

Second Skin said...

-Frannie Pantz- Thank you :) maybe it was but I wasn't ready for it I guess. oh well.

- Retro Reva!- Hey lady! Thank you for the heart song! So happy to hear from you!!

- Daily Fashionista!- Whoa! Hi there! Its so nice to hear form you! It does feel good to be blogging again! Even if it is sporadic. I hope you are doing well! thanks for popping in to say hi!

- Liv- Hahaha! The 80s! I am so happy you said hello and I hope that something I say resonates with you to aid in your sharpening :)

- Meg - You had an animal summer too!? Good to hear! For a minute I was thinking that maybe I am the only animal summer person here! Interesting that your husband hates the fall. hmmm.

- Terra - I am so happy to have you in my corner. You have no idea how valuable that is for me. Thank you.

- Kelly- thank you so much for telling me this! I hope to be sharing some isights and perhaps some style photos but i am not really sure how this thing is going to develop right now. just letting it grow organically and waiting to see what king of flowers bloom I guess. :)

- Terri - So happy to have you back too. I look forward to being refreshed by you as well. :)

San said...

Very interesting thoughts, I think I'll have something to ponder now. The choice of pics are fab too.

Second Skin said...

Thanks a lot San. :) I wonder what you came up with? I would love to hear about your thoughts.

knittingnora said...

Just thought I would check in an- AH HAA! Your writing again.

I don't get to sit and really dig in reading right now but I have been thinking of you lately....

Found it interesting you mentioned the third eye. What is that? I have been told on a few occasions I "have" that....

Hope you are doing well!! I admire you so...

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